What is PMO?
PMO. A very popular term within the no-fap community. Let’s start with the beginning.
As you watch porn, you get an urge. As you act on those urges, you receive a sense of satisfaction – even though it only lasts for a few moments. As you begin to give this process a name, you name it the PMO.
In more technical terms – It refers to Porn & Masturbation until Orgasm. It can be used as a noun and as a verb.
Here is a short list of some more acronyms that you might have come across: PE (Premature Ejaculation), ED (Erectile Dysfunction), DE (Delayed Ejaculation) & PIED (Penis Insertion Erectile Dysfunction). It feels nice to know what certain things mean especially when you are in a social setting so that you don’t confuse it with something else entirely.
Today we will look at the various questions that many people have in relation to PMO, and 5 actionable tips to help take back control of your life.
Table of Contents
- What is the PMO Addiction
- How PMO destroys you
- How long will it take you to be free from PMO?
- The Success Mindset
- 5 Tips to finally say goodbye to PMO
If you find this blog on addictions related to pornography and compulsive masturbation interesting, then you might also be interested in reading more about no nut relapse and how to win the no nut challenge.
When you think about addictions, it is pretty easy to assume that you will not fall into any. We consider ourselves too smart or even strong-willed to the extent that the thought of having an addiction- let alone an addiction to porn and masturbation, seems like a foreign concept. So- We dive head first into the deep waters of porn, where it all begins.
In the beginning, you came across this definition of PMO: “Porn, Masturbation, Orgasm,” in that exact order. It basically describes the series of events that one goes through in order to satisfy the urge to get that dopamine hit.
This is done by watching imaginary people seen on an electronic screen (or paper/magazine) – although not that common a source in today’s day and age.
You might be surprised to know that this actually began with this acronym: “MO.” MO means “Masturbation, Orgasm,” which means satisfying yourself with your imagination while not viewing any kind of stimulating pornographic materials.
It is this MO combined with porn that upgrades the acronym, and also an addiction to this entire process at its core.
How PMO Destroys You
Now, to the
bad good stuff. Why you should steer clear from PMO.
In order to cut out the problem of PMO, you should be able to grasp the severity of this problem. Why are you struggling with it? How did you even get to this point? When you acknowledge that there is a problem, you will be able to take steps to address it and cut it out for good, because without it, you will never be motivated to quit.
1. It develops within you, a twisted take on sexuality
- And therefore, it ruins your personal relationships. When you are addicted to porn, you are in an essence, excited by the appearance of nudity and sexual bits. A rush of dopamine floods your brain, whenever you see some action, and you are then stimulated to feel that feeling, in whatever way you can.
- Your taste in porn gets weirder, the fantasies get more aggressive and impersonal, and your mind is forever being drawn to whatever excites it most. If you are in a relationship, you will realize that you don’t love your girlfriend, maybe not even her body. You might just want to do it with her to get that fix.
- And the worst is that it all becomes a chore for you. Porn disgusts you after you are done with it. You start feeling guilty before you even started and all throughout this, your human interaction falls into shambles.
- You might have a hard time sympathizing with others. Keep masturbating and you will treat women with contempt, and a lack of respect, an object to get your fix.
2. It Reduces testosterone levels and energy levels
- PMO will leave you feeling lethargic and unmotivated. A combination of reduced energy levels, along with a lack of empathy for people can lead to a severe lack of motivation in life. Masturbation will drag you back into a lethargic mess, spiral you out of all your accomplishments, and will make you lose track of your passions, life’s work, and relationships that you truly cherish.
- PMO will waste time. If you believe that you already spend a lot of time fapping now, continue PMO and you will get into weirder porn and you will double that time you spend as you move forward with it. You will begin going on a decline in testosterone and your energy levels will plummet.
- Endlessly searching for the perfect video, or wrestling with the urges even when you are doing something that is not sexual in nature – trying to keep your mind focused on your work.
3. PMO is Guilty Pleasure – The Bad Kind
- The images you see and the videos you watch have a strong hold on your mind, habits, and your day to day life. This excitement and rush when acted upon will forever be subpar to a real sexual experience with someone you love.
- While porn will make you feel like you are really there, you will remain forever disconnected from the beautiful real-life sexual experiences in several ways – It is someone else that is doing the act, it is filmed for money and the girl is a stranger who is enhanced to play on your mind – you are alone, stimulating your self.
4. Depraved Industry
- Although it seems obvious but every time you visit these websites, you view ads, probably pay for a porn subscription and become an enabler for an industry that is degraded to its core.
- You participate and encourage an industry that promotes rape, child harassment, the perverted objectification of women, and the prostitution industries in third-world countries where girls from low-class families are abducted and sold at a brothel market.
5. Lastly, it is hugely addictive
- In the beginning, I made a point stating that we often feel that we are above all sorts of addiction – be it smoking, drinking, or pornography.
- But, It is addictive. Like drug abusers or wow-addicts, you can and will become addicted, if you don’t stop right now.
How long will it take you to be free from PMO?
In one line. The moment you recognize you have a problem with PMO Addiction, you will begin to do something about it. If you start today, it will take you lesser time, if you have a solid game plan in place. At the end, of the day. Your goals are only as successful as the processes you choose to address it.
So in general, people often start on their journey to quit PMO and make long strides in their effort to not indulge in this activity, only to one day get an intense urge and fall back to watching porn to then again fap 3-5 times in a row, getting devoured by guilt.
Popular research body suggests that it takes approximately 120 days to re-wire your brain. If that is anything to go by, then you can expect to continue with your solid processes and willpower for at least 3 months to say that now you are at a turning point.
The Success Mindset
Whenever you are stuck with a dilemma, you are faced with the option of a) giving in and accepting the new reality or b) Rising above the problems and understanding that nothing is invincible, so you can actually defeat the problem that you are facing.
You have most certainly chosen option b) because otherwise, you won’t be here trying to fix it, so that already makes you one step closer to defeating the addiction. Now, as is written in the ancient book titled “The Art of War”, Tsung Tsu wisely stated that in order to defeat your enemy – the PMO in this case, you need to learn everything about it beforehand. All its attacks, temptations, everything.
In the case of PMO, you will notice that each time you begin giving in to your addiction, it doesn’t just happen out of the blue. You get an urge – a strong urge that is generated due to various external triggers.
However, as you choose to acknowledge these urges, and the triggers that cause them – you are able to control when you take action. As you begin to refrain consciously, you will notice that they lessen, and become less frequent. These triggers are most effective at trapping you when you are at your most susceptible to giving in to the urge.
For example – At the end of the week when you are tired, when you have complete privacy with your own computer, when you are having a hectic day, or when you are simply bored.
Understanding and equipping yourself with a defense mechanism for each such scenario will pull you out from the holes of the trigger and urge and prevent you from falling down one in the first place.
5 Tips to finally say goodbye to PMO
When urges rear their head, slay them by the nape. Do so by stopping them from having a place in your mind. However, there is more we can do than just rely on our self-control, which can become a rare commodity the more addicted we are.
1. Mindset Shift
- This has to do with your willpower. No matter how many processes you have perfected, you are the one who can silence your mind and stop those urges.
- Do not entertain them. You should understand the seriousness of your problem. Your brain is in recovery mode. No matter what happens – treat sexual thoughts like venom. You must not touch, smell, see or perceive a sexual thought, let alone take it over
- The best defense is offense and therefore you have to learn to say no. Say no to your urges and the momentarily comfort that it promises to give you. Use all the methods you can to win from these thoughts such as push-ups, socializing, walks, prayer, and lightly hitting yourself to snap you out of the trance.
2. Minding your thought
- Masturbation and porn always begin with a thought.
- What prevents action – thought, what prevents thought? When it isn’t accessible – It’s better to use blockers that actually work
- Even if months have gone by and you are on an impressive streak, you can still get serious urges creeping up on you out of nowhere.
3. Do not entertain them
- Just because you are on a decent streak and take measures to distract yourself when you find yourself being surrounded by urges, this will make you stop thinking about it and soon enough, the urge will go away on its own.
4. Visual temptations
- Once you have achieved the method to silence triggering thoughts, this is what follows. However, as intimidating as it might seem you can simply look away or play some games on your phone or listen to music.
- If it is a swimsuit model, don’t look at her, Is your favorite porn star in news? Don’t look just turn the page.
5. Using technology to your advantage
- It was probably tech in the first place that aggravated your addiction, but that doesn’t mean that it can’t be the solution either. Use no PMO app on your phone and all the devices that you use.
- If you are have done everything that you can think of and still struggling to clear all these thoughts from your mind, it is completely unhelpful if you still have access to material for your PMO addiction.
- Be it magazines, bookmarks, or erotic texts. Delete all these materials and get blocker extensions that can stop online viewing as well. Delete all the materials now, and never think about them again.
As you learn how evil addiction is and how degrading PMO is, you will learn to acknowledge the problem and take immediate action against it. Accept your addiction, and treat it with the seriousness it deserves. Avoid intrusive thoughts by distracting yourself and not compromising your goals and your vision.
In the end, when we endure a journey that is tough, our brain tries to rationalize our previous thought patterns. Don’t let it. Don’t give in to the excuses and the rationalizations – it’s all a desperate ploy by your brain- to make a last effort to make you give it that fix.